Isn’t “Homosexual” an insulting title?

This post is not suitable to be read with a child looking over your shoulder.  I’m not writing crudely just for the sake of crudeness, but crudeness is sometimes a byproduct when speaking of the most intimate details of our lives.  

The term “homosexual” describes someone’s sexual preference.  It describes what kind of person you have sex with.  And if I were homosexual, I would find it completely appalling to have society define me as a person by something so intimate and personal.  

Why would “who I want to have sex with” be the thing that defines me as a person?  How insulting is it that our primal urges should be one thing that society uses to label us?  There are days when I want to punch everyone I see.  My childish selfishness and anger with the world are the only emotions I feel.  But I don’t want Angry Man to be what people call me.  It seems that with my schedule lately I’m always tired…..But I don’t want everyone to name me Sleepy.

Identifying people by their primal urges is a superficial,

Disney-fied way of looking at the world.

To label someone “homosexual”, to let that be the thing that identifies them in your eyes, shows just how little you care about them as a person and just how little you want to know them for who they really are.

I love music by Lake Street Dive.  I enjoy splitting firewood….I like the smell of fresh oak, the sound of an axe splitting a log and I enjoy the exertion.  I absolutely hate working on cars, even simple maintenance like changing the oil.  If I could have any job in the world I’d be a country music singer, but alas I’m nearly tone-deaf and haven’t been able to learn the guitar in my twenty years of guitar ownership.  Fall is my favorite time of the year.  I can’t stand being wet.  Whether the water is coming down on me (rain) or rising up on me (swimming), it all irritates me when I get wet.  I’m terrible at shooting doves, but absolutely love going dove hunting.  It’s never, ever bothered me that I’m so awful at it…I just think it’s a great time.  I’d be absolutely lost without my wife, I can’t even work our DVD player without her help.  Tater Tot Casserole is one of my favorite meals.  I think Simon Winchester is the greatest story-teller of our time.

That’s just a little bit of who I am.  If you take the time to get to know me, that’s the person you’d know.  And all of that is what I’d like you to think of when you see me.  And because I’m an actual person with dreams and disappointments and personality I’d be appalled if you introduced me as “Eric, he prefers a vagina.”

“Homosexual” is a descriptor, not a title.  If we need to use it as the former, so be it.  But using “homosexual” as a title is shallow, childish and crass….Whether is given as a title by the media or taken as a title by those inclined to do so.

I’m a person composed of, and identified by,

more than just my sexual urges.  We should all be.

While we’re on the topic of using “homosexual” as a title….Since when did who you’re having sex with become such a topic of everyday discussion?

If I were homosexual I would be disgusted by how infatuated everyone else was with my sex life.  If you’re going to identify someone by who they have sex with, it seems perfectly fair to me for them to be able to title you as “Bob, who had seven sexual partners before he was married” or “Suzy, who lost her virginity when she was seventeen”.

What’s that?  Those things are crude (I warned you) and shouldn’t be a topic of conversation, much less the way you introduce someone?  True and true.

And since that’s true, it’s about time we realize that people who engage in homosexuality are more than just their urges.  They’re real people.  They should be treated like real people.  Because if all they see in themselves are their sexual urges, it may very well be because that’s all that we see in them too.

 

2 Comments on “Isn’t “Homosexual” an insulting title?

  1. That was awesome and on point. My coffee came thru my nose when I read what you’d be appalled at being introduced as!